Author Topic: Can you Dance?  (Read 3743 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Green bee

  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 526
  • Thanked: 47 times
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: Sophia nc
Can you Dance?
« on: January 02, 2017, 11:39:21 am »
AN OLD WOMAN WALKED UP AND TIED HER OLD MULE TO THE HITCHING POST.
AS SHE STOOD THERE, BRUSHING SOME OF THE DUST FROM HER FACE AND CLOTHES, A YOUNG GUNSLINGER STEPPED OUT OF THE SALOON WITH A GUN IN ONE HAND AND A BOTTLE OF WHISKEY IN THE OTHER. THE YOUNG GUNSLINGER LOOKED AT THE OLD WOMAN AND LAUGHED, "HEY OLD WOMAN, HAVE YOU EVER DANCED?"

THE OLD WOMAN LOOKED UP AT THE GUNSLINGER AND SAID, "NO,... I NEVER DID DANCE... NEVER REALLY WANTED TO."

A CROWD HAD GATHERED AS THE GUNSLINGER GRINNED AND SAID "WELL, YOU OLD BAG, YOU'RE GONNA DANCE NOW," AND STARTED SHOOTING AT THE OLD WOMAN'S FEET.

THE OLD WOMAN PROSPECTOR -- NOT WANTING TO GET HER TOE BLOWN OFF --STARTED HOPPING AROUND. EVERYBODY WAS LAUGHING. WHEN HIS LAST BULLET HAD BEEN FIRED, THE YOUNG GUNSLINGER, STILL LAUGHING, HOLSTERED HIS GUN AND TURNED AROUND TO GO BACK INTO THE SALOON.

THE OLD WOMAN TURNED TO HER PACK MULE, PULLED OUT A DOUBLE-BARRELED SHOTGUN, AND COCKED BOTH HAMMERS.
THE LOUD CLICKS CARRIED CLEARLY THROUGH THE DESERT AIR, AND THE CROWD STOPPED LAUGHING IMMEDIATELY.

THE YOUNG GUNSLINGER HEARD THE SOUNDS, TOO, AND HE TURNED AROUND VERY SLOWLY. THE SILENCE WAS ALMOST DEAFENING. THE CROWD WATCHED AS THE YOUNG GUNMAN STARED AT THE OLD WOMAN AND THE LARGE GAPING HOLES OF THOSE TWIN BARRELS.

THE BARRELS OF THE SHOTGUN NEVER WAVERED IN THE OLD WOMAN'S HANDS, AS SHE QUIETLY SAID, "SON, HAVE YOU EVER KISSED A MULE'S A**?"

THE GUNSLINGER SWALLOWED HARD AND SAID, "NO M'AM... BUT I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO.

THERE ARE FIVE LESSONS HERE FOR ALL OF US:

1 - Never be arrogant.
2 - Don't waste ammunition.
3 - Whiskey makes you think you're smarter than you are.
4 - Always make sure you know who has the power.
5 - Don't mess with old people; they didn't get old by being stupid.
Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Albert Einstein

Offline Jen

  • Platinum Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 10175
  • Thanked: 240 times
  • Gender: Female
  • Location: Upper California
Re: Can you Dance?
« Reply #1 on: January 02, 2017, 01:15:32 pm »
 :D And I know how to load and fire a double barreled shotgun Gbee  ;)
There Is Peace In The Queendom

Offline Green bee

  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 526
  • Thanked: 47 times
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: Sophia nc
Re: Can you Dance?
« Reply #2 on: January 02, 2017, 01:31:27 pm »
:D And I know how to load and fire a double barreled shotgun Gbee  ;)
something tells me your telling the truth ;D
Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Albert Einstein

Offline Perry

  • Global Moderator
  • Gold Member
  • *******
  • Posts: 7382
  • Thanked: 390 times
  • Gender: Male
    • Brandt's Bees
  • Location: Annapolis Valley, Nova Scotia
Re: Can you Dance?
« Reply #3 on: January 02, 2017, 03:03:54 pm »
Loved it! :D :laugh:
"It is not the man who has too little, but the man who craves more, that is poor."      
Forum Supporter

Offline Wandering Man

  • Gold Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 1839
  • Thanked: 175 times
  • Gender: Male
    • Life Lessons from dogs, bees and others
  • Location: Victoria, Texas
Re: Can you Dance?
« Reply #4 on: January 02, 2017, 05:24:28 pm »
Wife knows her way around a double barrel shotgun, too!



Never argue with drunks or crazy people

Offline Green bee

  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 526
  • Thanked: 47 times
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: Sophia nc
Re: Can you Dance?
« Reply #5 on: January 02, 2017, 07:37:29 pm »
She don't miss! Seems to me a lot of women shoot better than there givin credit. My wife is a good shot. But I don't think she's that good...nice video  :o
Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Albert Einstein
The following users thanked this post: Wandering Man

Offline iddee

  • Administrator
  • Gold Member
  • *******
  • Posts: 6122
  • Thanked: 405 times
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: Sophia, N. C.
Re: Can you Dance?
« Reply #6 on: January 02, 2017, 08:14:06 pm »
When my kid sister was dating her husband to be, she begged to go squirrel hunting with him. Finally, one Saturday he relented. He told her if one was sitting still, she could shoot at it with the 22 rifle. If going from tree to tree, he would get it with the shotgun.
First one sitting still = shot eyeball out.
second one sitting still = shot eyeball out.
Third one going across treetops. third shot knocked eyeball out.

They have been married almost 50 years now and he has NEVER let her go hunting with him again.   :laugh:
“Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me... Anything can happen, child. Anything can be.”
― Shel Silverstein

Offline neillsayers

  • Gold Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 2173
  • Thanked: 197 times
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: Arkansas Ozarks, U.S.A.
Re: Can you Dance?
« Reply #7 on: January 02, 2017, 08:39:46 pm »
 :laugh:
Neill Sayers
Herbhome Bees
USDA Zone 7a

Offline Green bee

  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 526
  • Thanked: 47 times
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: Sophia nc
Re: Can you Dance?
« Reply #8 on: January 02, 2017, 09:19:01 pm »
Quote from: iddee link=topic=6430.msg82206#msg82206 date=1483406046

They have been married almost 50 years now and he has NEVER let her go hunting with him again.   :laugh:
[/quote
haha that's funny . Sounds like he could take some lessons from her :D :D
Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Albert Einstein

Offline riverbee

  • Gold Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 8924
  • Thanked: 410 times
  • Gender: Female
  • ***Forum Sponsor***
  • Location: El Paso Twp, Wisconsin
Re: Can you Dance?
« Reply #9 on: January 04, 2017, 11:44:32 pm »
dancin' and gunslingers............thought i was readin something about garth brooks new album............:D :D :D

dance lessons......


"THERE ARE FIVE LESSONS HERE FOR ALL OF US:

1 - Never be arrogant.
2 - Don't waste ammunition.
3 - Whiskey makes you think you're smarter than you are.
4 - Always make sure you know who has the power.
5 - Don't mess with old people; they didn't get old by being stupid."


............. :D :D :D

LOL!  very true! love it!............ :D
some of this goes with an old sayin' of mine in my previous field of work.............."don't write checks with your mouth that your arse can't cover"................ :D :D :D
i keep wild things in a box..........™
if you obey the rules, you miss all the fun.....katherine hepburn
Forum Sponsor

Offline Mikey N.C.

  • Gold Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 1393
  • Thanked: 76 times
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: Cameron N.C.
Re: Can you Dance?
« Reply #10 on: January 08, 2017, 09:07:01 am »
Good one , made me laugh this morning.

Offline neillsayers

  • Gold Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 2173
  • Thanked: 197 times
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: Arkansas Ozarks, U.S.A.
Re: Can you Dance?
« Reply #11 on: January 08, 2017, 01:36:56 pm »
Riverbee,

Where do you get those cool emojis. :)
Neill Sayers
Herbhome Bees
USDA Zone 7a

Offline Perry

  • Global Moderator
  • Gold Member
  • *******
  • Posts: 7382
  • Thanked: 390 times
  • Gender: Male
    • Brandt's Bees
  • Location: Annapolis Valley, Nova Scotia
Re: Can you Dance?
« Reply #12 on: January 08, 2017, 06:13:08 pm »
How about this guy?
Apparently there may be a gimmick to it, but WOW!
"It is not the man who has too little, but the man who craves more, that is poor."      
Forum Supporter

Offline Wandering Man

  • Gold Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 1839
  • Thanked: 175 times
  • Gender: Male
    • Life Lessons from dogs, bees and others
  • Location: Victoria, Texas
Re: Can you Dance?
« Reply #13 on: January 08, 2017, 07:51:41 pm »
How about this guy?
Apparently there may be a gimmick to it, but WOW!


Yes, he was very proficient with guns.  I think he travelled a lot giving exhibitions.

He was also a gunsmith.  A lot of folks in Cowboy Action Shooting sent their guns off to him to have them improved: lighter springs, improving the fixed sites, etc.

Also, notice the front part of the holster is cut way short, to allow for a quick draw and return to the holster.

With those quick draws, he is just firing and shooting, not aiming.  When he aims, it took him a bit longer.

Bob Munden died in 2012.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bob_Munden
Never argue with drunks or crazy people

Offline riverbee

  • Gold Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 8924
  • Thanked: 410 times
  • Gender: Female
  • ***Forum Sponsor***
  • Location: El Paso Twp, Wisconsin
Re: Can you Dance?
« Reply #14 on: January 11, 2017, 05:38:18 pm »
"Riverbee,

Where do you get those cool emojis.
:)"

neil, there used to be an add on program for firefox, i forget the name of it. (i think smiley's extra?).  it went away as the developers decided not to update it, keep it going, or whatever.

every time i found one i liked, i saved it and uploaded to my photobucket account.

i keep wild things in a box..........™
if you obey the rules, you miss all the fun.....katherine hepburn
Forum Sponsor